date: Sunday, February 28, 2010 @ 8:56 PM
I understood.
i always thought that as long as i tried my best to give u all my love,
so naive to think that 1 day u would come back to me.
but i was wrong
it was never the case.
the affections that u gave me,
the times we spent 2gether,
i will cherish them.
it has become a drag to both of us,
i m juz amazed that i m a hindrance to ur life,
stopping u frm moving on,
i shouldnt haf read ur smses,
but no worries, i understood.
u haf changed,
i grieve for the person of the past,
not the present.
i been to ur doorstep,
but i realli lost faith in u,
i can no longer trust u.
though i miss u alot n i still love u,
i prefer u move on.
its like everytime something happens,
u choose to leave,
other than leaving, can u salvage the situation?
u told me in the past that u wouldnt give up on us,
i m trying my best but u choose to leave the 2nd time,
leaving me wif a 2nd heartbreak
i duno how far i would go,
but much pain i gona endure,
having fever now, all thanks to u.
is it my fault?
yes, its all my fault,
my fault for hindering u frm pursuing ur own happiness.
date: Friday, February 26, 2010 @ 10:21 AM
Sometimes i juz duno wat to say to u
u know, when i said u can do anything u wan,
it hurts my heart to say that,
i have to suffer all these in silence
yes, u can go all out and meet new people
but at the end of the day
pls dun make use of me
as a tool to ease ur boredom or ur needs.
yes, i am sad and jealous over things
but so what?
do u care?
i m disappointed but i m tryin my best to control myself
i lost faith,
right now i wanna devote more time in my studies.
Today, went out for gathering wif my primary sch gd friends
well we were talking abt ur lives,
and how i wish i could be like them
havin someone to call me, asking me what time i will be back
telling me to be careful,
sms u when i get back.
All these, i juz wish i could get them back.
date: Thursday, February 18, 2010 @ 8:49 PM
well i always thought that at least someone was realli true to me
but i was wrong.
what u said in your perspective differs from reality.
i admit i m glad that we somehow got back together,
maybe that is onli how i feel
but nevertheless, i am touched by the sweetness that we shared,
just holding hands, just going out together,
even cooking for me for the 1st time,
able to open my eyes and look at you in the morning,
it somehow revive my heart.
But guess what,
i saw ur sms.
i thought i can trust u wholeheartedly,
i tot as least in this world i can trust you,
but not anymore.
i duno what u treat me as
but i dun realli care now
u are free to know any one
u are free to date anyone
u are free to do anything u wan.
i m not jealous, juz heart broken
but i still cherish my love for u,
juz wan to be by ur side
juz wan to make u happy
its that simple.
love can be simple, i guess my love for u never changes.
time will heal everything.
date: Monday, February 15, 2010 @ 9:01 AM
Stupid. Thats the word to describe me, am i right?
why should i even grieve?
i shouldnt even bother,
u can do anything u wan,
and that include hurting me.
to think how i much i did for u,
u took things for granted.
i felt so foolish and silly looking at myself like this.
yes, perhaps u r right,
i did u wrong n i deserve my retribution
but i dun deserve tat kind of treatment.
i should not care,
i should not be anymore naive.
although my heart aches for u,
pls dun take it to heart,
i am just a foolish fuck.
u know u can go do watever u wan,
pls dun feel obliged to give me an explaination
i am just a nobody,
i am just someone whose care and concern is wasted upon.
y not jus tel me to the face and ask me to fuck off.
